Dane Cook doesn’t want to talk like a normal person, he wants to talk like *THIS*. Even when you aren’t saying anything, it makes you sound *IMPORTANT*. Even if you are a total *DOUCHE*.
A couple other thoughts:
1) Red Sox fans like Dane Cook are devastated after winning the world series, and it’s the worst thing that could happen to the Cubs. Mystique, gone. The only thing left to do is bandwagon on some other luckless team so that you can keep blabbering about “The Curse.” Idiots.
2) I finally figured out a reason to root for the D-Bags, I mean Backs, which is their game 3 starter, Fat Livo! I was reminiscing last night about when Craig and I used to get McDonald’s — 20 piece Chicken Mcnugget, each — and bring them into PacBell in honor/support of Fatboy’s starts.