Did anyone watch the debates on Saturday? I caught the replay of the Democratic event (unless it really was live on the East Coast at like 1 a.m.) and I am going to pop some balloons up in this bitch: Obama is motherfucking boring.
I know he’s got way more to lose right now so he’s gotta play it safe and just keep saying “audacity of hope” and “bring the country together” and all that, but sometime since I last paid attention, that dude got really vanilla.
More of me acting like I know what I’m talking about–as well as one awesome quote from Bill Richardson–after the jump.
I mean, this is all relative, because all those motherfuckers are boring, but I feel like Obama used to open his mouth and I’d just be riveted to the TV. But now he feels all stiff and talking-pointy. Or maybe I’ve just got the rumored “election fatigue” they say is going around. (Not to be confused with the infinitely more awesome “gun fever.”)
The only reason I watch debates is to determine which of these robots is best at faking like they’re human. My biggest problem is that these douches very rarely answer the question they’re asked.
The debate ended with Charlie Gibson asking each candidate to think about everything they’ve said during these debates, and pinpoint one thing they’d like to take back. Hillary led off by totally avoiding it, saying something to the effect of “That’s something to think about, and I would like to point out the difference between the Republican debate and our debate: We tackle the issues here, and they don’t.”
Really? You can’t even answer the fucking question. Let’s just say your theory seems flawed.
Edwards got off the hook by quipping on the remarks he made about Hillary’s outfit; totally inconsequential, but at least it was a valid answer. And then Obama said “I would like to echo Hillary’s comments,” and then proceeded to say the same stupid shit about Democrats and Republicans, totally avoiding the question and going the extra douchey mile of piggybacking on Hillary’s non-answer. It’s like, just pretend for five minutes that you can demonstrate the human characteristic known as “humility,” and your chances of getting my vote increase by 7,000%. Obamabot failed.
Bill Richardson, of whom I have been a big fan, did not let me down, as he was the only one who answered that question as it intended to be answered. He said he was once asked to choose his favorite Supreme Court justice, and he chose the late Whizzer White because he was appointed by JFK, his political hero. But, Richardson continued, “… then I find out that “Whizzer” White was against Roe versus Wade, against civil rights. You know, so that’s — that wasn’t a good one.”
So yeah, that was pretty dumb, but he got the biggest laugh of the night, and at least he was honest enough to admit that he made a mistake. I’ll take a president who makes mistakes and fesses up over a group of folks who won’t ever claim to have made one, because then then’ll never admit that anything is wrong and nothing will ever get fixed because they’ll be too busy convincing you that everything is fine (see America, 2000-present).
I will be voting for Richardson unless Hillary is still in it when the CA primary rolls around, in which case I’ll have to vote for whoever her top competition is at the time. (I don’t know that Middle America is actually ready for a woman president, but I know for a fact they don’t want that one.) But they need to get a treadmill up in that bitch, because Richie’s chins kinda freak me out.